Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Oh No He Didn't!

After filling my days with Real Chance at Love, Megan Wants a Millionaire and Kourtney & Khloe Take Miami, you can imagine how excited I was to see that My Antonio was premiering. Antonio Sabato Jr. is a hot 80s hunk who appeared in all of my Bop and Teen Beat magazines.

It started out like any other celebrity dating show. A bunch of busty babes stand around on an island talking about how they haven't had sex in awhile and need to get some lovin' from Antonio. Antonio appears on a boat and strips off his shirt so everyone can gawk at his beefy frame. He dives into the water and swims toward the ladies.

He stands dripping in front of them and starts chatting them up. Suddenly, he pulls one fetching young filly out from the crowd and chats her up in French. (Yes, I said in French - Stephanie and Kelly!)

He asks her what she finds attractive in a man - she says arms, chest, blah blah blah. Then he says that he finds hands and feet attractive in a woman and he just wasn't attracted to her hands and feet. In a split second, he booted her off the show - based soley on her hands and feet.

Creepy much, Mr. Sabato, Jr.? Do you have foot fetish magazines hanging around your house? I checked out her hands and feet and they looked perfectly normal. No man hands, calluses or scraggly cuticles.

I'd hate to see what he'd do if he met me - my second toe is longer than my big toe (which is a sign of wisdom) and my nails are always peeling and breaking. I forget to take off my nail polish, so it's usually chipped.

Actually, I should send him pictures of my hands and feet just to horrify him because what he did to that poor girl was mean. She was adorable and he made her feel like she had lobster claws for hands and orangutan feet. (Although she said she won Best Hands and Best Feet in high school, and I don't think that was a real category.)

After that bit of nastiness happened, I deleted the show. Sorry Mr. Sabato, Jr., you are not deserving of a spot on my DVR!

No comments: