I'm Going to Get in a Rumble

The cafeteria lady has it in for me. She hates me. This is the one who yelled at me for not weighing my three strawberries separately when I put them in my oatmeal. (Yes, I'm still bitter.)

Yesterday, I was crabby and in the mood for something bad for me. I got in her line because it was shortest. The woman across from me had a Styrofoam container and told the cafeteria lady that she had a tuna fish sandwich. Bitchy McGee (AKA cafeteria lady) said OK and rang her up.

I too had a Styrofoam container, so I announced the delightful treat I had. She looks me up and down and says, "I still need to see what's in the container." Lo and behold....I had exactly what I said I had. She acted like I was trying to steal from the cafeteria. If I were trying to steal, I would have picked something cheaper.

Ugh. I'm never getting in her line again. She has a vendetta.

Really Bizarre Quotes from Republican Candidates

This pre-election season is really getting on my nerves. It's negative and nasty and repulsive. Republican Senator Rick Santorum recently compared Iraq to Lord of the Rings. I love Lord of the Rings, but I don't really see the similarities. Here's what he said:

As the hobbits are going up Mount Doom, the Eye of Mordor is being drawn somewhere else. It's being drawn to Iraq and it's not being drawn to the U.S.," Santorum said. "You know what? I want to keep it on Iraq. I don't want the Eye to come back here to the United States.

Say what? What does that even mean? Who represents the Eye of Mordor and who are the hobbits? I'm confused. Why don't we want people looking at the U.S.? Are we doing something bad? I'm interpreting the hobbits as our soldiers, Mount Doom as Iraq and the Eye of Mordor as world attention. Am I wrong? Save me.

Here's a goodie from John McCain - sadly, he was my semi-OK Republican, but not anymore:

When asked for his reaction to a potential Democratic takeover of the Senate in the midterm elections, McCain said, "I think I'd just commit suicide... I don't want to face that eventuality because I don't think it's going to happen. I think it's going to be tough, but I think we'll do OK."

Commit suicide. Nice. If America can put up with 8 years of a buffoon in the White House as well as one of the most corrupt legislative bodies in recent history, I think he can deal with a Democratic majority in the Senate.

People bug me.