Things I Must Have

Exhibit A - The Bacon Wallet

Who needs to eat bacon when you can carry your money around in it?

The marble-fat design hides the everyday wear and tear that many wallets face. It coordinates with every look - even patterns.

I can only hope that it comes with that new bacon smell.


Exhibit B - USB Fiber-Optic Christmas Tree

Ahh...a marvelous Christmas tree that plugs right into your computer.

You know, I'm always getting feedback that I need more "flava" in my cube. This would be a great way to spread some holiday cheer in the workplace.

Apparently, if I make my cube feel more home-like, I won't mind spending my entire life there. In fact, I might move in permanently!


Exhibit 3 - Cereal-On-The-Go

Look - I can take cereal for lunch and avoid soggy cereal! That way I can avoid the mean cafeteria lady questioning my choices when I want Frosted Flakes for lunch.

My last mean cafeteria lady story, I swear:
I did get cereal for lunch one day and when I went through her line, she shrieked - "you're having that for lunch?" I'm telling you she has a vendetta. Really, it's none of her business what I have for lunch. Cereal is certainly more healthy than French fries.

One of my co-workers suspects that I must remind her of someone she doesn't like - maybe a bad babysitter in her past or a mean girl who beat her up in junior high. I swear, all I've ever done to her is order food and pay for it. (Except for those unweighed strawberries...)

Side Note

One of my co-workers told me that I looked like Sofia Coppola the other day. I don't think I do and if I had to look like a celebrity, I'd rather look like Jennifer Garner or Angeline Jolie or Jennifer Aniston or someone in People Magazine's Beautiful People edition. (Of course, since I resemble none of those ladies whatsoever, it's highly unlikely. )

ButI guess it's better than being told you look like Rhea Perlman or the "Where's the Beef" lady from old Wendy's commercials or Bea Arthur.