Screech's Darkest Secret

OK - this is way too good for me to pass up, I simply must share. VH1 has revealed the newest participants in its Celebrity Fit Club program. I usually don't watch this show - who really needs to see a bunch of F-List celebrities whining about doing push-ups?

However, there are some prime folks on this edition, so I may get sucked in. First, the people I don't care about: Cledus T. Judd (apparently a country singer); Da Brat (I'm guessing a rapper); Ross Matthews ("The Intern" from The Tonight Show - I don't know who that is, but that's how VH1 describes him); andWarren G (another rapper.)

Drum-roll please...here are the fun folks: Kimberly Locke (from American Idol Season 2); Maureen McCormick (Yes...it's Marcia, Marcia, Marcia from The Brady Bunch. I wonder if she'll fall in love with one of the contestants a'la Peter Brady from The Surreal Life); and Tiffany (former pop princess of mall tour fame - the first cassette I ever bought and 6th grade dance staple.)

And best of all...

• Dustin Diamond (Screech from Saved by the Bell)

Screechie Poo just got caught in one of those sex tape scandals - and word is he released the tape himself to get on TV. I've seen pictures of him recently and he didn't even look chubby - just more filled out then his stringbean teen self. This has to be a scam for him to be on TV. I bet he's been bulking up for the past month. (In fact, I remember none of these folks as being particularly overweight - maybe VH1 is running out of chubby celebrities)

Screech not only starred in the sex tape with two women -yes, two women - but they performed some sex act that I'd never heard of, and when I looked it up, it was so gross, I wished I had remained in the dark.