Friday, January 26, 2007

Leave Tyra's Tush Alone!

Poor Tyra! After starving herself for years to be a skinny-arse supermodel, she's now decided it's OK to have a piece of cake now and then. What happens? International media outlets start announcing her weight fluctuations like it's a stock report. ("Today she's pushing 200....yesterday she was down to 132.") They're calling her Tyra Porkchop!

Even on Tyra Banks' fattest, ugliest day, she still looks better than me on my best day. OK - maybe not when she put on the 300 lb fat suit and wore a shawl like in the picture above, but I'll take her "fat bathing suit" pictures any day of the week. For crying out loud, most people look better clothed (or at least with long pants on) -- particularly those of us who are bottom heavy.

Supermodeling should really be included in that television show about the world's most dangerous jobs - two have died this year because they didn't eat enough or mixed dangerous combinations like Diet Coke and speed! And all the drama with young hot Hollywood (Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, Lindsay Lohan and everyone, etc.) can be solved with a very simple fix -- give the girls cheeseburgers...they're STARVING! You don't see Rachael Ray in catfights with people -- that's because she eats. I get cranky if I skip my mid-afternoon snack. If I missed entire meals like these girls, I'd be pulling hair and pushing people down too.

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