Simon and I joined our friends Liz and Matt for a fun-filled day at Kings Island. It was not very promising at first - we drove through a torrential downpour (take that weatherman - 40% chance of showers, my arse) to get there.
At the gas station, I was waited on by a person named Dakota. I have no idea if Dakota was a boy's name or girl's name. I also have no idea if Dakota was a boy or a girl. Dakota had chin-length beige hair and glasses. Dakota was shaped like an egg. Dakota had a voice that was either high for a man or low for a woman. Dakota had either small breasts or large moobs. It was very perplexing.
Overall, Kings Island was a blast. We rode quite a few rollercoasters and absolutely no spinning rides. I think in my advanced age I'm even starting to find wooden rollercoasters too much for my delicate system. I actually thought I was going to vomit on the Racer. I also go to eat some of my beloved smurf ice cream. (It's just blueberry now - but it was smurf ice cream when I went there for my first visit 20 years ago, so smurf ice cream it remains!)
When you sit down, they recline your seats so you're lying down. And then they flip you, so it feels like you're flying. It was petrifying and amazing all at the same time. I highly recommend!